Revise with Point-First Writing and Stress Positions
Readers are better prepared to understand your message if they know upfront what’s coming. “Point-first writing” will help you prepare your readers.
Readers naturally remember best what comes first and last, called the “stress positions”. Use stress positions to shape your paragraphs.
Student lawyer, Ellen Onione, wants to revise the paragraphs in the section “The Landlord Can Evict You If Bingo Is A Nuisance” so that the points stick in Terry’s mind.
Below are the sentences in the order that Ellen wrote them. Help her reshape the paragraphs.
For pointers from Ellen’s supervising lawyer watch “Shaping Paragraphs”
Use the green highlighter to mark the sentences that convey the most important information. If you change your mind, use the white eraser.
The Landlord Can Evict You If Bingo Is A Nuisance
Your landlord cannot end your tenancy because you violated a no-pet clause in your lease. As a general principle, no-pet clauses are not enforceable in residential leases. To evict you, your landlord will have to show that over the last three years Bingo’s behavior makes him a nuisance. Tenants with pets can only be evicted if the landlord proves that the pet unreasonably disturbs the other tenants.
A recent case summarized the various situations where courts allowed landlords to evict dog owners. Courts have decided that a dog was a nuisance when: the dog barked excessively when left alone; the constant barking could be heard even in the basement; the dog was permitted to urinate on the lawn; and the dog urinated in hallways and elevator. Because over the last three years you have never heard any complaints that Bingo disturbed other tenants, it is highly unlikely the landlord can show that Bingo is a nuisance. On the other hand, a court has found that a dog was not a nuisance when a dog owner always used a leash to walk the dog in and out of the building, even though another tenant was frightened by dogs. You told me you walk Bingo in and out of the building on a leash and your neighbours tell you that Bingo is quiet when you are away; therefore, we do not know any facts to support your landlord's eviction notice. In another case, the court did not consider a dog to be a nuisance where the sound of the dog's claws on the kitchen floor annoyed the tenant below.
The Landlord Can Evict You If Bingo Is A Nuisance
Your landlord cannot end your tenancy because you violated a no-pet clause in your lease. As a general principle, no-pet clauses are not enforceable in residential leases.To evict you, your landlord will have to show that over the last three years Bingo’s behavior makes him a nuisance. Tenants with pets can only be evicted if the landlord proves that the pet unreasonably disturbs the other tenants.
A recent case summarized the various situations where courts allowed landlords to evict dog owners. Courts have decided that a dog was a nuisance when: the dog barked excessively when left alone; the constant barking could be heard even in the basement; the dog was permitted to urinate on the lawn; and the dog urinated in hallways and elevator. Because over the last three years you have never heard any complaints that Bingo disturbed other tenants, it is highly unlikely the landlord can show that Bingo is a nuisance. On the other, hand a court has found that a dog was not a nuisance when a dog owner always used a leash to walk the dog in and out of the building, even though another tenant was frightened by dogs. You told me you walk Bingo in and out of the building on a leash and your neighbours tell you that Bingo is quiet when you are away; therefore, we do not know any facts to support your landlord’s eviction notice. In another case, the court did not consider a dog to be a nuisance where the sound of a dog’s claws on the kitchen floor annoyed the tenant below.
Now drag and drop the sentences to reorder them and take advantage of stress positions. Put the main idea first (topic sentence), supporting and lesser information in the middle, and the paragraph's synthesis or emphatic point last. When you're done, do the same for paragraph 2.
